Custom Connections
If you follow us online, you know that we have been talking all about connections this month. Now, some of you may be thinking that I am talking about love connections. However, I am not-connections come in many different forms and each one can have a profound impact on our overall sense of wellness. Connections remind us that we need one another in order to survive-and that connections are powerful and should be treated with care.
So, what does it mean to treat a connection with care? To me, a sensitive Black woman, care is like a warm blanket on a cold winter’s night. Not only do you need to have the blanket on hand in case it gets cold, but also you have to make sure that it stays together to use it in the future. You see the value in the blanket and develop an appreciation for it. Caring for connections can be similar in that there are steps that need to be utilized if you want to strengthen the connection. Neglecting connections can sometimes mean losing that connection. So, here are a few tips to keep in mind:
1. We are all connected. Whether it is a connection to nature or to a person, each connection serves a purpose. Consider asking yourself what aspect of your wellness the connection serves. If it does not serve your wellness, consider what boundaries may need to be placed in order to maintain your sense of wellness.
2. Consider what connections might still be needed. Some connections may not have the capacity to give you what is needed in the moment. Fortunately, there are many different opportunities for connections. Apps like Meetup can help you search for connections based on interest.
3. Accountability. It takes at least two to maintain a relationship. Yet, often it can be easy to blame someone for losing touch or not hanging out in a while. Instead of blaming others, consider ways that you can improve the relationship. Warning: this does NOT mean that you do everything. In order for connection, whether, work, friends, or a significant other, each partner needs to contribute something to strengthen that connection. It cannot survive well on one person’s effort.
Everything is connected in some way. Thus, it is important to cherish those connections that help us build a healthy internal and external community. This month (and beyond), take a moment to observe who and what you are connecting to. Is it helpful or harmful? What do you wish for the connection? Take a moment to envision and plan-connections do not have to be something to fear-in fact, it can be a friend, but we cannot get there without facing it. So, happy connecting!